At any local photo shop or craft store, pick up a simple 18” x 24” poster frame.  Encourage your child to gather up all of the souvenirs that he’s saved from the season—baseball game tickets, Summer Reading Club stickers, amusement park admission stubs, postcards, maps, brochures, photos—and get to work putting the best memories on display.

Work with your child to arrange the momentos and affix them to colorful construction or scrapbook paper. Allow the display to dry overnight, then re-assemble the frame, using the cardboard backing to support the collage and carefully placing the glass over your child’s treasured items. If your frame comes with a mat, invite your child to write a personal message to finish off his collage. A simple “Summer 2010” will do, but a favorite memory or saying will preserve the moments in his own words.

Display the creation in your child’s room or a common family area where the fun memories of summer will keep everyone warm well into the cold months of winter.

Growing Independence

From teaching him how to get dressed to toilet training and tying his own shoes, you have spent the last several years fostering your child’s independence.  Get ready to watch him leap forward in the proud world of “I can do it myself.”  There is just something about “being a Kindergartner” that makes kids want to do more on their own.  Encourage it!  A child’s self-esteem is linked with the knowledge that he can accomplish tasks independently.

Encountering a Bully

If it didn’t already happen on the playground or during pre-school, expect that your child will meet his first bully at some point during this school year.  Be aware that it will break your heart to see your child hurting and that you will have to control the claws that instinctively extend from your Mama bear paws.  While most schools have “No Bully” programs and actively intervene in kids’ conflicts, there is bound to be a mean girl or a rough boy who finds ways to bully beneath a teacher’s radar.  Before the school year begins, equip your child with specific strategies for handling bullies.

Losing A First Tooth

There’s quite a bit of variation between children when it comes to losing their baby teeth, but chances are good that you can expect at least one visit from the Tooth Fairy during your child’s Kindergarten year.  Do some research on the going rate for teeth in your child’s class; see what you can do about dissuading that one “Fairy” in the neighborhood from giving out $20’s for teeth!  If you’re really lucky, school picture day might even coincide with your child’s new, toothless smile.

Loving Learning

Maybe you’ve long-suspected that your child will need some extra assistance when it comes to learning to read. Perhaps your gut tells you that you’ve got a gifted son or daughter whose creativity needs to be nurtured.  You can expect that in Kindergarten, your child’s individual learning needs will be identified and tended to.  Plan to be an advocate for your child.  Use school conference times and IEP meetings to voice your observations, concerns, thoughts, and requests and consider yourself a partner with school personnel in shaping your child’s educational experiences.  When kids’ individual learning needs are met, they are most likely to develop a lifelong love of learning.

At the same time, school isn’t free of stress, pressure, and challenges. So, how do you as a mother help your kids navigate the school years with success and lessons that will extend beyond the classroom and help them the rest of their lives?

Party Topic

This Tuesday, join the #gno Twitter party to share and learn tips for helping your kids to get off to a successful school year. Also, join us in our effort to raise $1,000 for at-risk teens in partnership with Tipping Bucket!

The party goes from 9-11 p.m. ET (8-10 CT, 7-9 MT, and 6-8 PT).

Be sure to check out this week’s giveaway where you can enter for a chance to win a $100 Visa gift card to help offset the cost of back-to-school clothes and supplies.

Party Details

• What: Girls’ Night Out (#gno) Twitter party (Click here to learn about #gno!)
• Sponsor: Tipping Bucket
• When: Tuesday, August 31 from 9-11 p.m. EST (8-10 CT, 7-9 MT, & 6-8 PT)
• Where: Party with us on our very own Custom Tweetgrid! Check back Tuesday for the link to the grid. (Use hashtags #gno and #TippingBucket.)
• Topic: Back-to-School Tips for Success
• Who: Brand Panelists: @tippingbucket @wishboneorg Community Panelists: @highimpactmom @jenwag57 @parentella @simplyandreah @teachermomoftwo @teacherwthsoul @volunteerspot Moderators: @jylmomIF @Dadventurous @troypattee and @momitforward
• Party Favors: Enter for a chance to win a $100 Visa gift card (three winners!): http://bit.ly/bP8zj4.

RSVP

Use Mr. Linky below (enter the twitter URL and your twitter ID (e.g., http://twitter.com/jylmomIF).

Note: Mom It Forward accepts paid sponsorships for most #gno Twitter parties. During the parties, brand sponsors provide tips, techniques, expert advice, and information on party topics. Mom It Forward is grateful for the giveaway prizes, coupons, and discounts that sponsors also provide to the Mom It Forward community in conjunction with #gno Twitter parties.

It was such an unusual reaction for her, not just because of her love of conversation, but also because she has such a zest for life and approaches most things with unfettered zeal and excitement.  Even to me, she would clam up when I asked about school, until the night before Kindergarten, she finally said to me simply, “Mama, I just don’t know what to expect tomorrow.”

Despite the fact that we had been to the school for Registration Day in the Spring and had attended an in-class orientation with her teacher and future classmates the week before, the unknown is scary for children.  Every school is different, but here are some of the basics that may help your Kindergartener-to-be know what to expect this school year.

Structure

As with most good day care and pre-school programs, Kindergarten will run according to a predictable and regular schedule.   Whether your child is attending a half-day or full-day school, you can count on a structured program that includes time for early math, writing, and reading skills and instruction in subjects like art, music, physical education, library, and computers.  Since socialization is such an important part of the Kindergarten experience, your child can also expect that much of his learning will be done alongside of his peers, on the carpet at the front of the room, in centers around a chosen topic, or in pairs at a grouping of desks.  And the best part of the daily schedule: snack time is built into many Kindergarten routines.

Newness

The structure of Kindergarten provides the consistency and predictability that kids need to feel safe and to learn effectively.  Within this framework of “knowing what to expect” from the schedule each day, the newness of school and school life becomes manageable and even thrilling.  Will your kids ride the big, yellow bus for the first time this year?  Will they eat in a cafeteria?  Will they play on the playground at recess?  From attending assemblies, to seeing the school nurse, to going on field trips, your Kindergartner can expect to become more comfortable with newness this year.

Fun

The expectations of Kindergarten are different than in pre-school.  Kids are expected to be able to sit quietly for longer periods of time, to stay on task, and to achieve significant learning.  On the other hand, Kindergarten is designed with five and six year olds in mind, and any curriculum developer knows that play is the work of children.  Your child can expect that his Kindergarten days will be fun, designed around 100-day countdowns, themed-projects, holiday celebrations, catchy songs, and funny poems.

The day my daughter bravely boarded the bus for her first-day of school, I took a deep breath and didn’t fully exhale until three hours later when she ran off the bus and jumped into my arms.  “I love it, Mama!”  she began.   “Did you know that when I got there, Mrs. P had my name at my desk waiting for me and we have our own bathroom right across the hallway and you get two choices for snack each day and we’re even going to learn to count to 100 this year and…”  My chatter-er was back!  She knew Kindergarten was going to be just fine.   Luckily, we had all afternoon to talk about it!

Stay tuned for Part II next Wednesday!

As moms, we are counting down the last days of summer, and, at the same time, making sure everyone is all set for their first days of school.  Backpacks have been stocked with fresh paper and sharpened pencils, homerooms have been assigned and now everyone seems to be anxiously awaiting that first bell. Your kids may be set supply-wise, but are they really prepared to excel this semester?

Three Tools to Help Kids Develop Great Study Habits

The author of Tutor in a Book, (Adams 2010), a study-skills book for families and students, and the experts at Thinking Caps share the tools for success this fall semester—tools that lead to awesome study habits that will last longer than the first week.

1. Have the right materials. When that school supply list comes in the mail, make sure your child has all of the items on it before the first day.  They don’t need to be new: notebooks that are only half-used make for great loose-leaf paper.  Make sure not only he or she will have the proper materials for the classroom, but also make sure that your child’s study spot is also stocked as well.  This helps avoid distractions when it is time to start homework time.

2. Choose the right spot. Make sure your child has a spot in the house where he or she can do homework every night.  It can be a desk or a spot at the dining room table, but the important thing is that the spot stays consistent and that it’s not too cluttered to do work.

3. Follow a plan of action. Now that your child has the necessary supplies and has a functional work space, it is time to create a game plan.  This is a go-to guide on how and when to get homework done.  It could be a daily to-do list of assignments that need to get finished, a list of reminders such as proofreading essays or reviewing math problems.  The plan is important because it can alleviate some of the anxiety that school and homework can bring.

Alexandra Mayzler is the founder and director of Thinking Caps Tutoring. Her major interests are focused on learning processes and development of study skills that encourage critical thinking and academic success. Alexandra is the author of Tutor in a Book a study skills manual for students, parents, and teacher and numerous articles on education topics. She consults with schools and families and her work has been featured in publications such as the New York Times. She is the director of Thinking Caps in New York and spends her free time thinking about how to make studying easier, more interesting, and above all, enjoyable for her students.

I’m not above attributing my poor judgments to others, but in this case, I claim separation and distinction from a friend who is a perfectionist when it comes to her home. She refuses to let her elementary-school-aged children help out with household responsibilities.

I often tell her she is crazy—in a nice way.  But since I can’t see things her way and she can’t see them from mine, how about if you tell us if we’re both nuts or if you tend more towards one of our philosophies (not that you won’t get a biased picture of mine here…)

Her side of the story (told in my words) is pretty cut and dry.  She likes things the way she likes them and would prefer to do all of the housework herself rather than have her children do things “incorrectly.”

“But what about passing on all that you know about making perfect beds and setting a beautiful table?” I protest.

“They can learn that from watching me,” she reassures.

“Doesn’t your daughter ever ask to pick out her own school clothing?” I wonder.

“She used to ask, but now she just knows that I lay all of the clothes out at the beginning of the week and that’s what she wears,” she replies with pride.

“Don’t you ever get tired of doing everything for all three of your kids?”  I ask, exhausted just thinking about it.

“It is a lot, but it makes me more tired to think about undoing their mistakes.  When I do it myself, I know it will be done the way I want it.  It’s a lot easier now that I don’t let them have play dates here anymore—that used to be a real mess for me to handle,” she says, finally tiring of my queries.

So, what do you think?

I’ll tell you my take on my friend-with-the-immaculate-home.  In a word—crazy!  In two words—control freak!  In more compassionate terms—she is meeting her own needs for control at the expense of teaching her children valuable lessons in responsibility, choice, and contributing to the household.

So here’s my side of the story; I actually feel a little ping of embarrassment whenever my kids see me scrubbing toilets or mopping floors.  I do want them to know that I work hard to keep a clean house for our family, yet I worry that they’ll think that cleaning is what “moms do.” When they look back on me in 20 years, I would prefer their memories to be of a mom who joyfully played with them or at least one who involved herself in intellectual pursuits. Visions of me knee-deep in cleansers and laundry would be such a waste!

Likewise, when I don’t let them help, I feel guilty. I know that kids who routinely help out around the house benefit from improved self-esteem and greater personal responsibility. I also know that kids who experience the drag of cleaning up after themselves are kids who tend to make fewer large messes.

Most of all, I am holding out hope that when my kids are teens, they will feel comfortable inviting their friends to our house. My own controlling tendencies mean that I want to know who my kids’ friends are and where they are hanging out, so I want to lay the groundwork now for a home that is inviting to young people. When my friend tells me that she doesn’t allow play dates at her home due to the mess, I worry she’s in for a much bigger clean-up job down the road.

So, what do you think? Where do you fall on the Let Them Help vs. Do It Yourself continuum? Do you let your kids help around the house even if it sometimes means more work for you? Do you teach them a “right” way to do things or can you accept their method as “good enough?” Do your kids feel good about themselves when they are given household responsibilities or are they relieved that you take on the domestic chores yourself?

And this week, Hunt’s wants to help two lucky families have a High Five moment with all the items necessary to plan the Ultimate Summertime Party.

The Prize

Five people have the opportunity to get a High Five from Hunt’s in this week’s giveaway.

• Two grand-prize winners will receive an Ultimate Summertime Party Basket (ARV $375), including:

$100 Target gift card

BBQ set

Hunt’s 100% Natural Ketchup

Box of party invitations

George Duran Cookbook

Badminton set

Decorative place mats and table cloth

Fun party glasses

Decorative lanterns

Beverage bucket

• Three runners up will each get a $50 Visa cash card.

Entry Requirements

For a chance to enter and win, please complete the following three requirements and leave a separate comment for each:

1. Visit the Hunt’s Ketchup website, check out the News & Promotions section to learn about Hunt’s $5,000 family vacay giveaway. Then, come back here and leave a comment on this post, sharing your family’s ideal vacation spot.
2. Tweet two of the following:

• Chat mealtime memories & family togetherness @ #gno Twitter party w/Hunt’s 2NITE (9-11 ET)! http://bit.ly/b8dBJ9 #HuntsHighFive PLS RT
• GIVEAWAY! Enter 2 win the Ultimate Summertime Party Pack from #Hunt’sHighFive (ARV $375) http://bit.ly/bbgD2M #gno PLS RT
• Share ur fave fam memories in Hunt’s photo contest 4 chance 2 win $5,000 fam vacay! Ends 8/5 http://tiny.cc/rijlz #gno PLS RT

Extra Entries

The following five entries are completely optional and will earn you one extra entry per item for this giveaway. Leave a separate comment on this post for each completed entry.

1. Visit Hunt’s Ketchup website, check out their recipes, and leave a comment on this post, sharing which recipe you’d most like to make your family.
2. Follow @momitforward on Twitter.
3. Follow Mom It Forward on Facebook at http://facebook.com/momitforward.
4. Become a Friend of Mom It Forward’s Google Friend Connect (see box in right sidebar).
5. Subscribe to the Mom It Forward RSS feed (click on orange heart at the bottom left on the homepage).

Terms and Conditions

No purchase necessary to enter. Giveaway ends at midnight ET Thursday, August 5, 2010. See all terms and conditions here.

Three Guidelines for Effective Praise

To build the best possible foundation for your child, practice these three simple guidelines for effective praise:

1.     Use Your Words

The first thing to remember about effective praise is that it needs to be spoken aloud. Never assume that your son is aware of how great it is that he helps his sibling or that your daughter knows she did a good thing by sharing her toy.  Tell your children in words how you feel about what you see.  Add in a gentle hug and kiss to reinforce your praise.   It is a human need to receive positive feedback.  What’s more, giving praise for your child’s desirable behaviors is also one of the best ways to ensure that the behaviors are repeated—bonus!

2.    Mean What You Say

The best praise is that which is honest and sincere.  False or empty compliments do not give a child valuable information about what makes them special, unique, talented, or strong; it gives them nothing to build on. Base praise on an action, trait, skill, or ability that the child can understand and can intentionally repeat. Praise builds relationships. When you offer a child a sincere compliment about something that is genuinely meaningful, you discover things that you enjoy in common with him, thereby adding to the foundation of your bond.

3.     Say What You Mean

Be specific when giving praise to a child.  Compare these statements:

a)    Nice job.

b)    I really like the way you helped me with your baby sister, by putting on her crib shoes.  You were very helpful and kind.

Which compliment gives your child clear information about the behavior you would like to see repeated?  Which one is more likely to build their self-esteem as an important member of your family?

Spoken, sincere, specific praise builds the foundation of your child’s self-esteem.  It also strengthens the bonds between family members and encourages the repetition of positive behaviors.  Now that’s a house you can all live in together!

Signe Whitson is a freelance writer and co-author of The Angry Smile: The Psychology of Passive Aggressive Behavior in Families, Schools and Workplaces. She is also a licensed social worker and mother to two young daughters. Please visit her blog about passive aggressive behavior.  My Baby Clothes Boutique provides her articles to help give back to the parenting community.

Their goal is to give you the best information and the easiest way for you to find the toys, videos, electronics, accessories and more that are perfect for your child… or yourself!

The Prize

Time to Play is providing one lucky winner with an awesome prize pack with these toys and products (ARV $280):

• Graco Interactive Smart Baby Doll, $79.99
• Velcro Kids Royal Princess Castle, $29.99
• Alex Cap it Off Jewelry Set, $17.99
• Whiplash Scooter, $79.99
• Iron Man Techbot, $14.99
• Crayola Glow Explosion, $9.99
• Crayola Dry Erase Travel Pack, $9.99
• Barbie Pocket Learner, $24.99
• Bakugan Bakutriad, $12.99

Entry Requirements

For a chance to enter and win, please complete the following three requirements and leave a separate comment for each:

1. Follow @timetoplay on Twitter.
2. Visit the Time to Play website, check out the Toy Reviews section, and leave a comment on this post, sharing one toy you’d most like to get your child and why.
3. Tweet the following:

• GIVEAWAY! Enter 2 win an @timetoplay prize pack full of toys (ARV $280) http://bit.ly/bv1U6i #timetoplay #gno PLS RT
• Check out great toy and game reviews on http://timetoplaymag.com. Perfect site for back to school! #timetoplay PLS RT

Extra Entries

The following five entries are completely optional and will earn you one extra entry per item for this giveaway. Leave a separate comment on this post for each completed entry.

1. Follow @jimsilver and @thetoyguy on Twitter.
2. Follow @momitforward on Twitter.
3. Follow Mom It Forward on Facebook at http://facebook.com/momitforward.
4. Become a Friend of Mom It Forward’s Google Friend Connect (see box in right sidebar).
5. Subscribe to the Mom It Forward RSS feed (click on orange heart at the bottom left on the homepage).

Terms and Conditions

No purchase necessary to enter. Giveaway ends on at midnight ET Wednesday, July 28, 2010. See all terms and conditions here.

Water sports at Summer Camp

Do you remember the first time you went to camp? How old were you when your parents left you to fend for yourself, among a group of other kids your size and older?

If you were like many kids away from home in a cabin, you probably thought you were in another world that was both scary and exciting. Camping as a family outing is almost unheard of to most kids these days, and summer camp is often as close as they get to real camping.

My niece’s son, Noah, who is 9 years old, recently went to his first summer camp—it was a week at a nearby lake camp with other kids from the area. One thing they asked the parents to do was to provide handwritten notes that could be given to each child each day. This would ensure the camper heard from a parent or family member every day, and let them know that they were missed.

Children will usually take summer camp one way or another: they either love it or hate it. The younger a child starts to attend camp, the better the chances are that it will be enjoyable for them. When a young person gets to the tweens or teens, they become set in what they think is entertainment, and camping can be the least appealing of the choices they would make. In the case of Noah, he loved it!

It helps when children are able to make friends fast when they are at camp. On the first trip, there is a possibility that almost every child will be a stranger to them, and even when they go every year, there is no guarantee that they will see the same groups of people on any visit. Probably the most important lesson at camp is to relate to new people and get along harmoniously. Parents can make this an exciting part of camp for their child, and make it a game for them to learn as much about the other kids in their group.

Some parents depend on camp to teach their children some structure for their lives, and it is a good way to instill basic disciplines of doing things on time and following orders, while enjoying themselves at the same time. The difference from discipline in school and camp is the fun factor, and the fact that Mom and Dad aren’t in the picture. I have found that kids can be totally different—usually in a good way—when they are on their own, and away from familiar environments.

There’s something very special about campfires and telling stories, singing, and just getting to know the people you might not see again after camp. Being away from television, video games, phones and all the other kinds of manufactured entertainment gives children an opportunity to be creative, and talk and learn more from other people. What contributes even more is if the camp policy is for no cell phones or at least limited use, so that the separation from the outside world is more complete.

Sleeping in a cabin with several other individuals is another learning experience as kids learn to respect others’ values and habits. Some children come from homes where they don’t have to share space with anyone else, and living in an environment where the opposite is true helps prepare them for life beyond their personal area at home.

Another thing to bring kids to the realization of important of respect for others is the bathroom setup. Most often, there is a separate washroom and shower area where they must not only leave their cabin, but must plan when they are going to go to allow for other people using the facilities. And they will have some fun with that too—Noah came back saying that boys were messy and stinky!

Not every summer camp is the same, but they all have similar activities, many of which concern water sports, such as swimming and boating. It is always best to teach a child to swim before they attend camp, but it is not a requirement. Counselors are versed in helping kids to learn swimming, but they are also in charge of many kids, making it an inconvenience to spend much time one on one with any single person.

Areas are usually roped off for swimming to prevent boats and personal water craft from coming too close and causing a hazard. Children who can’t swim have places in the water that are shallow enough for them to play safely under close supervision. There are some tips here on keeping children safe during water sport activities.

Water skiing and wakeboarding are two of the highlights for water recreation at camp, but other kinds of towables furnish fun for children of all ages. Because there are so many kids wanting to ride and limited powerboats to pull them, some of the favorite types of towables are the banana or hot dog style water toys, where several kids can ride at the same time.

Every summer camp at the lake or beach usually has a floating island or water trampoline where kids can bounce and jump, or go down an attached slide. This gives more children an opportunity to enjoy the water without waiting in line to be towed by the boats. They can work off a lot of energy on these water bouncers, and stay cool at the same time.

Because group activities, both in the water and out, are what most summer camps exemplify, most children get an education and experience they would never hope to find anywhere else in life. Although all those experiences will not be fondly remembered by every participant, the overall picture that children receive from their brief time camping is often a good and healthy one.

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