This is because we’ve bought into the myth that all it takes is self-control to achieve your goal, and conversely that our inability to achieve our goals is the result of a personal deficiency of strength or determination. And so we continue to try the same things over and over and hope for different results.

The Truth About Weight Loss

But the truth is, lasting weight loss is not as much about willpower as it is about awareness.

Awareness

First of all, it’s important to understand the physiologic factors that impact our eating behavior. Your body is smart, and if it doesn’t receive the right nutrients at the right times of day, the brain will signal “hunger,” and will drive you to eat no matter how much willpower you attempt to muster. Also, when you neglect to be present and aware while you are eating (for example multi-tasking or eating on the go), the brain misses the meal entirely and continues to signal hunger, overriding even the best-laid plans. Both of these scenarios can lead to irresistible carb and sugar cravings and evening overeating as the brain attempts to right the ship. The good news is that when you learn to work with your body’s physiology rather than against it, you dramatically reduce the need to exercise willpower.

Avoid Labels

Secondly, it’s critical to bring awareness to the subconscious factors that drive eating behavior. We all have these little things I call Possibility Bandits—namely limiting beliefs that hijack our possibilities and potential. For example, when it comes to eating and exercise, many women buy into disempowering labels, such as emotional eater, stress eater, fat, lazy, sugar-addict, etc., and we don’t realize how these labels subconsciously drive our choices. You see, all of these labels come with a predetermined set of rules for how a person of that label behaves. And when you look more closely, virtually all of these labels are masks for an even deeper label—weak and powerless. (Even “not enough willpower” is one of these!) And they can very quickly become excuses and self-fulfilling prophecies.

So, if you’ve been struggling with a perceived lack of willpower, I encourage you to stop and ask yourself two questions: 1) Where can you can bring more awareness to your eating?  2) What labels or limiting beliefs might you be buying into, and what choices might you be making if that belief weren’t true? Challenging the belief is the first step to transforming it.

Ultimately, your life experience is a direct reflection of what you choose to believe about yourself. When you choose things like capable, powerful, wise, and deserving, you’ll soon start to see them reflected in your experience and your results!

What are you doing to achieve your weight loss goals?

Image courtesy of iStockphoto.com

Michelle Leath is a coach, mentor, speaker, and the founder ofwww.unlockyourpossibility.com. She teaches women how to harness the power of possibility, permission and pleasure to create the lives they truly want and deserve. She specializes in helping women create a relationship with food and their bodies that works for them, so that they can release unwanted weight or food habits without dieting or depriving themselves, and so they can show up like the rock stars they are in their businesses, lives, and relationships! Having found recovery from an eating disorder herself, Michelle is passionate about helping others heal their food issues, and she also authors a blog on eating disorder recovery at www.michelleleath.com.

Michelle is a graduate of the Coaches Training Institute, a Certified Food Psychology Coach, and has a degree in Psychology from the University of California at Santa Barbara. She has helped women connect with their potential in various ways for over 20 years. 

3 Exercises for Mommies-to-Be

1. Car Seat Pulls

Sculpts & strengthens the back & core

Keep your back strong as you prepare to repeatedly move your baby’s car seat from the stroller to the back seat. Face your chair with your feet at least shoulder width apart (your stance will become wider as your baby grows), and hinge forward at the hips with a flat back. Place one hand on the seat of the chair. (If you have wrist pain or the surface of your chair does not feel supportive enough, feel free to hold a free weight in the supporting hand as well.) Use the other arm, with at least a five pound free weight in hand, to row back as if you are pulling the car seat out from its holder. Lengthen the arm back down and repeat for 30 seconds. Sara encourages keeping the core activated by thinking of hugging your baby close to your spine. If you are comfortable, feel free to walk your feet out into a plank and perform the exercise here as well. Take a 15 second break before repeating for 30 seconds on the other side.

2. So Big!

Sculpts & strengthens the legs, glutes, & shoulders

Prepare your body for playing “So Big!” with Baby. Sara reminds mommies-to-be that if you don’t learn how to do it properly, lifting your baby up over and over again can lead to back pain, so let’s practice correctly before Baby arrives! Begin seated in your chair with your legs at least shoulder width apart. Hold one weight (at least five pounds as your baby will soon be bigger than that) in each hand at your shoulders. As you stand up, push your heels into the floor and press your weights up and together above your head, just as if you were raising your baby up. Finish by sitting back onto the chair. Repeat the entire sequence for 30 seconds. Remember, you are trying to initiate this movement from your legs, not your back, so try to stand up as straight as possible as you do.

3. Get Up

Sculpts & strengthens the triceps

Are you afraid of becoming the pregnant woman who struggles to Get Up out of her chair? Start practicing early with Sara by strengthening your triceps! Take a seat in your chair. Place your hands behind your glutes and slowly walk forward until you are no longer sitting on the chair. Press your shoulders away from your ears and lower yourself down in an attempt to form a ninety degree angle from your shoulders to your elbows. Then slowly push yourself back up. The farther you walk your feet away (NOT your glutes) the harder the exercise will become. Repeat for 30 seconds. As your baby grows, your number of reps may decrease or you may need to take a seat on the chair in between reps.

What exercises or activities do you do to stay in shape during pregnancy?

That was the consensus, at least, among tweeters at a MomItForward Twitter Girls’ Night Out just after the New Year. Sponsored by Together Counts, a nationwide program inspiring families to live healthier and more actively, it was a party of support and fun as tweeters shared recipes and tips that have worked for them.

Top 10 Tweet Tips for Staying in Shape During the Winter

1. Pick a different body area or life area to work on each month, and then blog about your journey. @ScrappinMichelle did this, labeling the whole thing “Project Balance,” and talks about her progress at ScrapsOfMyGeekLife.com.
2. Start or join a running group.@GGretchko says: “Group runs are motivating. I learn a lot from others.” If you need help finding or starting one, go to Meetup.com and search for running groups or clubs.
3. Keep an eye out for diaper dashes and kiddie races that are often free when attached to races. @Bodhi_Bear says her running club does this.
4. Try balance boarding while working at home. @DarrenLister says it’s “awesome” and @JennSutherland says it’s her favorite way to pass time on conference calls.
5. Only weigh yourself once a week, on the same day. “If you do it more often,” says @CountryPoohBear, “you’ll get discouraged.”
6. Add a little bit of fresh ginger to your family’s smoothies, advises @Jenn Sutherland. Ginger tastes great and is a terrific source of vitamin C, which boosts the immune system;magnesium, which helps keep blood pressure normal, bones strong, and the heart rhythm steady; and potassium, which reduces high blood pressure, maintains muscle strength, and reduces anxiety and stress.
7. Get an Xbox 360 with Kinect. While some may scoff at this as a way to stay in shape, it was a surprisingly hot topic during this Twitter party. Games like Kinect Sports Season 2 and Michael Jackson: The Experience were the favorites.
8. Hide the veggies in really good tasting stuff. We’ve talked about this before, but it bears repeating because of its effectiveness. @Byrdy1999 recommends “anything out of the Jessica Seinfield’s Deceptively Delicious cookbook…she can really hide her veggies…yum!”
9. Try Peasant Salad. @ForestofWishes says it’s her family’s new go-to recipe. “It’s so healthy, hearty, and we all love it!” She also recommends Potato Leek Soup. If you want to add creaminess, try slow-cooking it and adding a bit of milk.
10. Add quinoa to just about any soup, recommends @AwakeCreativity. Quinoa is high in fiber and protein.

If you do whatever you’re going to do to get or stay in shape with your family, your chances of success are higher. As @GFaccenetti says: “Anytime we can get out and have fun together accomplishes two things at once: family time and exercise.”

What are your favorite ways to get you and your family active?

Photo courtesy of Flickr.

If things are done right, a busy person can also be a fit person. We’ve offered some tips on how to do that here and here. Here are some more tips, provided by Tweeters at a MomItForward Girls’ Night Out Twitter party (#gno) sponsored by McDonald’s back in June.

6 Tips for Managing Time and Fitness

1. Use Google Calendar. This was the most tweeted tip. Both @MomInManagement and @MrsWndr say they use a mix of that and paper calendars to bring organization to their busy lives.
2. Check out FitDay.com, a free online diet journal and calorie tracker. This tip came from @KellyOlexa, who says, “@CraigRichard1 and I use FitDay.com to track my stuff. If I don’t track, I get way off.“
3. Check out Cozi.com if you have a smart phone. Recommended by our own @jylmomIF, it is a free online organizer and mobile that has family calendar, to-do list, shopping list, family journal, and meal planning features. She says, “It’s an awesome way to schedule appointments. Syncs with your phone. Great for grocery shopping too.”
4. Put nutritious snacks in single-serving baggies right after buying them, then put the filled baggies back in the box the snacks came in, so they’re ready to eat on-the-go, says @Katm21. Also, try putting smaller portions of less-nutritious snacks like chips into baggies and then back in their original container, so as to make portion control easier.
5. Give healthy options. While taking the unhealthy food options (i.e., ones with high sugar, fat, or sodium) out of the pantry altogether, give yourself and your kids lots of healthy options to choose from, so that no one feels deprived and it’s easy to pick some healthy as you’re heading out the door.
6. Check out this link from @CybraryMan1 for instructions on how to make a snow fort, Star Wars paper snowflakes, and other awesome winter activities with your kids.

How do you stay fit with a busy schedule? What helps you and your family to stay fit and stay on time for appointments, practice, school, work, etc.?

Photo courtesy of Flickr.

For me, it lapses into an unknown place between poopy diapers, preparing meals, coloring, and giving baths. Before I know it, the goal I had set for myself hasn’t even begun. I’ve been down this post-pregnancy road three times now and I’ve made mistakes. In fact, I’ve made lots of mistakes!

As a mom, I have this instinct that tells me that I have to take care of these little people as best I can. They are my priority. Taking care of me is set aside — last on my list of things to do. Can you relate?

You are not alone! Let’s do this together.

How To Get Fit and Maintain a Healthy Lifestyle

The following are baby steps that you can take to get fit and maintain a healthy lifestyle:

Start Where You Are

Don’t stress over setting lofty goals and exaggerated transformations. Set goals for the next 60 days. Don’t worry about being perfect. Just be better.

Move Your Body

If you can, go to the gym! There is no better option than time alone to focus on fitness. If guilt is holding you back, I understand. I’ve been there and I have the t-shirt (in a variety of sizes too). Your kids need mom to be healthy. You are the cornerstone of the family and taking care of yourself is just as much for them as it is for you.  But if you absolutely cannot get time away from your kids: you must move with the kids. This means PLAY, I mean, really PLAY! Dance like crazy for 10 minutes three times a day. Do extra laps up and down the stairs when you need to do the laundry. Lift hand weights, buying each child 2 lb dumbbells do to the moves with you. Get creative. You just have to be purposeful with your time! You CAN do this.

Focus On Food

Let’s not say “diet”, let’s say “conscious eating”. What is going into your mouth? If your answer is “I don’t know” or you are thinking “my child’s leftovers”, I hereby release you from the mommy zombie eating. Did you know that you don’t have to finish your child’s plate? While some may call this wasteful, I call it self-preservation.  Also, you MUST drink more water. I’m confident 99% of you don’t drink enough. 64 oz of water isn’t enough. You should drink half your body weight in ounces. This means that 64 oz is only good enough if you are 128 lbs or less. Water helps you detoxify and boosts your metabolism (which means staying hydrated helps you lose weight). It’s worth doing.

Bottom Line: Health is a gift you can’t buy and is something that you can’t afford to lose. You are worth it! Make time for yourself, get your family involved, make better decisions, ditch the guilt, and get healthy!

What are your New Year’s Resolutions? Do they involved getting into shape? How will you reach your goals?

Photo provided by Devin Noel Photography.

Jeannette A. Kennedy, MS, DC is a science geek turned mom of three who simply tries to do her best every day.

She always thought she’d be a superwoman doctor: helping patients to be healthy and strong, questioning the status quo, and making great strides for health professionals. She never thought she would choose another life, staying home, raising children, and even homeschooling! That is…until the first child was born. Then she realized there is no better way to leave a lasting impression than to be an awesome mom.

Jeannette is a seeker of knowledge, particularly of health, science, and all things kids. She holds a Masters Degree in Biomedical Science from the Medical University of South Carolina and a Doctor of Chiropractic Degree from Logan University. She is a social media junkie and a novice blogger excited about developing her own space to share her thoughts and ideas.

She and her husband, Dr. Jerry Kennedy, own and operate Midwest Upper Cervical in Belleville, IL where they raise their three children: Shaelin (6 years), Knox (2 years), and Beckham (5 months). 

This is the perfect time to introduce a workout regime into your schedule because once things slow down, you have already established your routine and you are ready to roll.

Tips for Working Out During the Holidays

Here are tips on how I workout during the holidays, with four kids of my own:

Set Goals

First things first, what is your goal in all of this?  Take 10 minutes to think about what goals you want to achieve in your fitness journey. Let it be for whatever reason makes you feel good. Set time frames around your goals and be specific so you can hold yourself accountable. For example, “I will walk 30 minutes every day until Christmas.” Not only will you feel  great from working out, but you will also feel a sense of accomplishment which isn’t so bad either.

Plan and Schedule

What is your reality with fitness during the holidays? Do you have access to childcare? Can you join a gym with a daycare? Do you need to schedule your workouts at home while your baby is napping? Get real with yourself and your schedule and create your plan.

If you are looking for non-gym options, make sure you have the right equipment to stay motivated. Be prepared with DVDs, weights, ballet bars, a jogging stroller, yoga mat…make it a priority. If you are working out at a gym, make sure you know the rules around daycare and check out their class or fitness training schedules before hand so you can plan it in to your day.

Do you like to do a morning jog? Jump out of bed and into your running clothes. Consider putting workout times into your smartphone calendar with alerts and don’t schedule anything else during that time.

Commit Yourself

You have done the planning, the scheduling, the strategizing. You bought the right equipment, joined the right gym, and now you need to commit. I can tell you how to get to this point, but you’re the one who has to make it happen. Don’t make excuses. Make this activity the one thing you are doing for yourself today.

Execute Your Plan

Adapt a daily mantra!  My favorite is, “Do it now. Do it now. Do it now.”

Reward Yourself

Spending time nourishing your mental and physical self should be reward enough, but sometimes it’s nice to dangle that carrot a bit.

How about a mani/pedi or a foot massage? Or splurge on that amazing bubble bath you’ve been eyeing! Do you have a hot dress in mind for New Year’s Eve? Rewards are a great way to thank yourself and your body for following through. You don’t even have to spend any money on a reward as feeling good and healthy is an amazing reward in itself.

How do you plan on working out during the holiday season? How will you maintain your health and fitness over the next month?

Photo courtesy of Flickr.

Stefanie Van Aken is RockStarMomLV, a lifestyle writer of all things Vegas, and contributes to several national on-line magazines.  She loves food, wine, yoga, and living green.  A mommy to 4 (with a set of 1 year old twins), wife, girlfriend and RockStar all rolled into one. You can read more about living her life at www.RockStarMomlv.com, FaceBook or Twitter.

10 Tips to Help You Reach Your Weight Loss Goals

At a MomItForward Twitter Girls’ Night Out party last week sponsored by CoolScuplting, tweeters discussed reliable things that have worked for them, both in terms of helping their mindset (which is half the battle), and helping their actions. Here are the top 10 most effective things:

1. Start somewhere. Do not think you have to run a marathon or stop eating entirely to get to your goal weight. @JennieBaird said, “I started running when I was 37. Ten minutes at first and gradually increasing. That was 6 years ago.” Pick one small thing, and do it one day, then one week, then a month, and grow it from there. @JoyceHarrellRN calls that taking “Kaizen steps.” It doesn’t matter if they’re baby steps if they’re consistent and they grow.
   
2. Get support. For some, that’s a husband or close friend. For others, it’s online. @pizzalogger says, “Ive been doing really well the past week. I started a new diet with support from @mamavation.” Mamavation is an online docudrama and weight loss support group for moms in social media. Other oft-tweeted support sites were SparkPeople and WeightWatchers.
3. Log your meals. @fitcoachMJ says, “Seeing what you eat may disgust you enough to change.” Various tweeters recommended the free site MyFitnessPal, because it lets users log meals online, link to their friends for support, and provides apps that sync with the site.
4. Follow blogs or Tweeters that provide healthy recipes or motivational ideas, like StayMotivatedWithMe.blogspot.com, @markhymanmd, or @inspiredrd.
5. Create a chain reaction for yourself, says @coolsculpting. The basic truth Louisa May Alcott put forth that “exercise develops wholesome appetites” still applies today: start to exercise, and healthier eating should follow.

To build and maintain a positive mindset, think about these things:

1. “What can I add to my health, not what should I take away?” from @JoyceHarrellRN
2. “Hope is a very thin diet.” quoted from Thomas Shadwell.
3. “What three things did I do well today?” @TroyPattee says this is “amazingly effective.”
4. “Who are five people I admire, and why?” This tip, and others to help you focus on your inner beauty first, were shared by Amy Harman, of BecomingaBetterWoman.com, through @jylmomIF, in this post.
5. “‘Diet’ is a four letter word,” says @pinkprincess928, adding: “I prefer to call it practicing moderation.”

What are your tried and true fitness tips to help you stay in shape? What are your weight loss goals?

Photo courtesy of Master Isolated Images.

I have always been a big believer of taking an active part in your health. Throughout a woman’s reproductive life, we see rhythmic patterns of change, monthly cycles, with the completion of these cycles with menopause. Educating ourselves on how best to prevent and/or modify our health problems allows us to enjoy a fuller life. Conventional approaches to women’s health tend to use surgery and other invasive medical procedures to manage relatively normal physiological functions, such as hormonal imbalances. Whereas, alternative medicine offers a more whole-body approach using diet and nutritional supplementation, herbal medicine, homeopathy, naturopathic medicine, traditional Chinese medicine, and Ayurvedic medicine, which can be safely used to address women’s health issues (Source:  Alternative Medicine – The Definitive Guide).

According to Susan M. Lark, M.D., of Los Altos, California, during perimenopause “estrogen levels swing between highly elevated and deficient with many side effects. Issues such as pre-menstrual syndrome (PMS), bleeding, and fibroids are very common. Often women who’ve had no PMS, will begin noticing more irritability or touchiness or classic PMS symptoms, such as food cravings, more tendency toward fluid retention, bloating, and breast tenderness. Combined with the more irregular menstrual cycle, women can feel pretty awful during this transition time” (Source: Alternative Medicine – The Definitive Guide). Okay, so what can we do to minimize these premenopause systems you might ask?

Some diet recommendations by Dr. Lark include a low-fat, high-fiber, more vegetarian-based diet with whole grains, legumes, raw seeds and nuts, fruits, and vegetables making up the core of the diet. I would make sure that you are including good fats in your diet such as coconut oil (great cooking oil), leaner meats and fish, and you really can’t eat enough greens. The person who knows your body best is you! Listen to your body after you eat certain foods to see if they energize or deplete you. Some supplements Dr. Lark recommends is vitamin B complex, vitamins B6, C, and E, bioflavonoids, magnesium, and either evening primrose oil or borage oil (Source:  Alternative Medicine). She also recommends talking to your doctor about natural hormone replacement (not the synthetic type our mother’s were given) if you are suffering from premenopause symptoms.

You can read more about natural hormone replacement in Dr. John R. Lee’s book as well to see if this might be a good path for you!  Remember you are your own best guide – listen to your body and ask your trusted doctors to help in your journey to health.

On a side note:  I went on to have a wonderful and healthy child after being told by the leading specialist on endometriosis that I would be unable to conceive. After three months of Chinese Herbs and Acupuncture, imagine the doctor’s surprise when he was the one to tell me I was pregnant!

How do you take care of yourself? How do you make sure you maintain your health and happiness?

Photo courtesy of Flickr.

References:

• John R. Lee., What Your Doctor May Not Tell you about Premenopause:  How to Balance Your Hormones and Life from Thirty to Fifty. (www.johnleemd.com).
• Burton Goldberg, Alternative Medicine – The Definitive Guide. Celestial Arts. Second Edition.

Melissa Northway is a mom, writer and has her Masters in Human Nutrition. Her storybook app Penelope the Purple Pirate has been chosen as a Top 10 Must-Have eBook by lilsugar of Popsugar.com and was in the Top 25 iTunes books. Please check out Penelope the Purple Pirate Facebook Page to see how you can enter to win some pirate booty! You can read more about Melissa and Penelope’s TLAP Giveaway at: www.melissanorthway.com. Penelope is having a Halloween Giveaway with loads of goodies.  For more information please go here: http://melissanorthway.com/news.html.

Although we’ve made great strides in the field of addiction in de-stigmatizing substance abuse, there are still pervasive stereotypes and myths in our society regarding what an alcoholic/addict looks and acts like. There remains the perception that people who abuse substances live substandard lives. In my experience, working as a marriage and family therapist with high functioning and successful families at the Caron Treatment Centers in Manhattan, I’ve found nothing could be further from the truth.

The truth is that addicts are lawyers and doctors, teachers and government officials. Substance abusers exist among people who have money in the bank, well-mannered children in good schools, prestigious addresses and successful careers. And yes, addicts are working and stay-at-home moms.

The reason we don’t think of these people as substance abusers is because their trapping of success enable them to hide it. The pressure for perfection, particularly among moms, can become too much to bear. Without healthy coping mechanisms, many moms become “silent sufferers”. They put up a façade of perfection to mask the anxiety, fear and overwhelming pressures they feel, self-medicating with alcohol.

Although these “high functioning alcoholics” may not drink or use every day, they become psychologically dependent on the substances they abuse – obsessing on their next opportunity to drink or needing to drink in certain settings.

Some of the signs of high functioning alcoholism include:

1. People who have trouble controlling their intake after they start using or swear off using again.
2. People who think obsessively about their next drink or using opportunity.
3. People whose personality changes after they start using.
4. People who experience “blackouts”, meaning they are not able to fully remember what happened during a using binge.

The lesson here is that moms need to take care of themselves. It’s OK to put yourself first sometimes and it’s absolutely OK to not be perfect.

If you’re a mother who struggles with the pressure of living up to the impossible standard set for moms, please know you are not alone. There is hope. Please also know that if you do resort to drugs and alcohol to relieve the pressure of motherhood – you are not a bad person. But you may have the disease of addiction and it’s important that you seek help for yourself as soon as possible. Alcoholism and drug addiction are 100 percent treatable. While typically high functioning people may be late to the recovery game, their drive and determination enable them to quickly catch up and find lives beyond their wildest dreams in recovery.

What pressures do you experience as a mom in the 21st century? How do you deal with and overcome these pressures in a healthy way?

Read a mom’s story: I Wanted To Be the Perfect Mom

Photo courtesy of Flickr.

Dr. Paul Hokemeyer is a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist based at Caron Treatment Center’s New York City Office. In addition to holding a PhD in Psychology, Dr. Hokemeyer holds a doctorate in the law. 

10 Bite-Size Ideas for Moving Service

1. Donate a used suitcase to a local foster care agency to enable foster care children to move from one foster home to the next with dignity.
2. Donate a Fresh Start Moving Kit like this one to help foster kids aging out of foster care. Contact your local United Way for more information.
3. Opt out of or remove yourself from the mailing list of one credit card junk mail solicitation, and save some trees.
4. Make the first move to increase the safety of your neighborhood by creating a phone tree organized by street so that in case of an emergency or power outage, neighbors can make sure everyone’s taken care of.
5. Walk somewhere you’d normally drive, to get your blood moving.
6. Calculate how many food miles your dinner moved to get to your house, using this link or this one, to understand  your carbon footprint better.
7. Check out this article from FirstMove.org on the benefits of teaching chess to kids, and consider teaching chess to your kids.
8. Follow MoveAmericaForward on Twitter, to find out more about their mission of supplying care packages to American troops in Iraq and Afghanistan.
9. Take a 10-minute walk twice this week to increase your movement. Go to AmericaOnTheMove.org if you need help getting motivation or ideas.
10. Like The Second Step on Facebook to find out more about how they help survivors of domestic violence move out of the cycle of abuse.

How Will You Give to Others This Week?

• What other ideas do you have for giving to others by moving?
• How has moving made a meaningful difference for you this week?
• How have others given to you this week and what difference has that made in your life?

How Else Can You Make a Difference This Season?

Make a meaningful difference this season by taking the Season of Service (SOS) Challenge. Here’s how you can participate:

• Commit to do one act of kindness/service based on the week’s challenge.
• Leave a comment with ideas relating to the week’s challenge as well as your experience(s) performing it.
• Enter to win each week’s giveaway. Check out this week’s prizes from PBS Kids by clicking here.
• Join #gno this Tuesday on Twitter to connect with other Mom It Forward moms about the challenge.