Home Management—Fifty years ago this month, President John F. Kennedy presented a bold challenge before a joint session of Congress: Send a man to the moon by the end of the decade. While many derided this notion as either madness or merely a political ploy, some of the brightest minds of the nation focused their efforts, and in 1969 the dream was achieved. In the same spirit as JFK’s appeal a half century ago, I am issuing a challenge to the geniuses of today to find a solution to one of the plagues in our world today, dirty laundry. More specifically, my dirty laundry. And come to think of it, it’s not just the dirty part I need help with but also the folding and putting away. In this modern world of space shuttles and supercomputers small enough to fit in the palm of your hand why are we still dealing with this?!

The only good thing I've ever found in a laundry basket

Silly putty? The Frisbee? Labradoodles? All great ideas, to be sure. But c’mon inventors of today, show us your stuff! I don’t know how it is in your house, but in mine the laundry responsibility lands on my shoulders. Perhaps if the laundry was not my responsibility I would have more time to dedicate to finding a solution to the laundry crisis. Until then I’m considering adopting the philosophy of Jack Reacher. He’s the main character in a book series by author Lee Child. Jack Reacher travels light, and part of traveling light means not carrying extra clothing. His solution? He wears them for 3-5 days and then throws them out. No fuss, no muss. A quick stop at the local thrift store or farm supply and he’s back on the road. Disposable clothing, it’s something to consider.

To be fair, I’ve recently discovered a product that is a step in the right direction. Hanes incorporates color-coded toes in their socks. For example, size 8 is blue, size 9 is red, and size 10 is black (or something like that, but you get the picture). The result is socks that are easier to sort. Brilliant! This is the type of forward thinking we need! Admittedly, it’s not as brilliant as Jack Reacher’s solution, but it’s a step in the right direction. One small step for mankind.

I’m not above attributing my poor judgments to others, but in this case, I claim separation and distinction from a friend who is a perfectionist when it comes to her home. She refuses to let her elementary-school-aged children help out with household responsibilities.

I often tell her she is crazy—in a nice way.  But since I can’t see things her way and she can’t see them from mine, how about if you tell us if we’re both nuts or if you tend more towards one of our philosophies (not that you won’t get a biased picture of mine here…)

Her side of the story (told in my words) is pretty cut and dry.  She likes things the way she likes them and would prefer to do all of the housework herself rather than have her children do things “incorrectly.”

“But what about passing on all that you know about making perfect beds and setting a beautiful table?” I protest.

“They can learn that from watching me,” she reassures.

“Doesn’t your daughter ever ask to pick out her own school clothing?” I wonder.

“She used to ask, but now she just knows that I lay all of the clothes out at the beginning of the week and that’s what she wears,” she replies with pride.

“Don’t you ever get tired of doing everything for all three of your kids?”  I ask, exhausted just thinking about it.

“It is a lot, but it makes me more tired to think about undoing their mistakes.  When I do it myself, I know it will be done the way I want it.  It’s a lot easier now that I don’t let them have play dates here anymore—that used to be a real mess for me to handle,” she says, finally tiring of my queries.

So, what do you think?

I’ll tell you my take on my friend-with-the-immaculate-home.  In a word—crazy!  In two words—control freak!  In more compassionate terms—she is meeting her own needs for control at the expense of teaching her children valuable lessons in responsibility, choice, and contributing to the household.

So here’s my side of the story; I actually feel a little ping of embarrassment whenever my kids see me scrubbing toilets or mopping floors.  I do want them to know that I work hard to keep a clean house for our family, yet I worry that they’ll think that cleaning is what “moms do.” When they look back on me in 20 years, I would prefer their memories to be of a mom who joyfully played with them or at least one who involved herself in intellectual pursuits. Visions of me knee-deep in cleansers and laundry would be such a waste!

Likewise, when I don’t let them help, I feel guilty. I know that kids who routinely help out around the house benefit from improved self-esteem and greater personal responsibility. I also know that kids who experience the drag of cleaning up after themselves are kids who tend to make fewer large messes.

Most of all, I am holding out hope that when my kids are teens, they will feel comfortable inviting their friends to our house. My own controlling tendencies mean that I want to know who my kids’ friends are and where they are hanging out, so I want to lay the groundwork now for a home that is inviting to young people. When my friend tells me that she doesn’t allow play dates at her home due to the mess, I worry she’s in for a much bigger clean-up job down the road.

So, what do you think? Where do you fall on the Let Them Help vs. Do It Yourself continuum? Do you let your kids help around the house even if it sometimes means more work for you? Do you teach them a “right” way to do things or can you accept their method as “good enough?” Do your kids feel good about themselves when they are given household responsibilities or are they relieved that you take on the domestic chores yourself?

Now that the kids are back in school, cleaning and organizing is just where my focus needs to be for a while. So, it’s a good thing Dyson is sponsoring the #gno Twitter party this week to help me get a little more motivated for fall cleaning.

Whether you love to clean or avoid it like the plague like I do, please come and share the good, the bad, or the ugly on housework, cleaning, and organizing with your favorite #gno gal pals this week. And, don’t forget to enter to win one of three Dyson vacuum cleaners.

What: Dyson is sponsoring this week’s #gno Twitter party (Click here to learn about #gno!)

When: Tuesday, September 1, 9-11 p.m. EST

Where: Join us as we party using this custom Tweetgrid. (Use hashtag #gno.)

Topic: Cleaning and organizing tips & tricks

Who: @aordinarylife from An Ordinary Life, @createdbymom from Created By Mom, @mommygoggles from Mommy Goggles, @mommymandy from Mommy Mandy, @mychaos from My Organized Chaos, @organizersandy from Organize With Sandy, @troypattee

Party Favors: Click here to check out this week’s giveaway sponsored by Dyson.

RSVP: Please leave your Twitter ID in the comments to follow and be followed (on Twitter, of course!) by other #gno gals. The best format is as follows: http://twitter.com/jylmomIF.

Prize

Three lucky winners will receive one of the following. (See entry requirements below.)

• Grand prize: Dyson DC 31 (handheld)
• 1st place: Dyson DC 24 (upright)
• 2nd place: Dyson DC 23 (canister)

Entry Requirements

To enter for a chance to win, you are required to do four things (make sure you leave a separate comment for each of your entries).
Note: Entries that do not follow all of these requirements will not be considered.

1. Become a fan of the Mom It Forward Facebook page.
2. Join Mom It Forward Google Friend Connect (see right sidebar).
3. Follow @momitforward on Twitter.
4. Post these messages on Facebook and/or on Twitter and leave comments here, linking to your messages:

Check out these housework/cleaning nightmares & share your own: http://facebook.com/momitforward PLS RT

GIVEAWAY! Enter 4 a chance 2 win a #dyson vacuum cleaner (3 winners) http://bit.ly/7cqtk Ends Sunday! PLS RT

Extra Entries

You can earn up to five extra entries for this week’s giveaway. Leave an additional comment for each.

1. Share your best or worst housework experience on the Mom It Forward Facebook fan page.
2. Read the Summer of Service post this week and either share how you completed the challenge or leave one cleaning or organizing tip.
3. Nominate a mom to be featured in the “inspiring moms” section of the Mom It Forward blog.
4. Join the Mom It Forward Facebook group.
5. Post the “Mom Is a Verb” button on your blog. (See right-hand sidebar for button with code.)

The Fine Print

No purchase necessary to enter. Winners will be selected randomly through http://random.org. Dyson and Mom It Forward employees are ineligible to participate. All entries received after Sunday, September 6 at midnight PDT will not be considered. Entries that do not follow all of the entry requirements will not be considered. Winners will be notified and will have 24 hours to confirm receipt of the e-mail. If they do not reply within 24 hours, another winner will be selected. Open to participants in the US and Canada 18 years and older.

Have a cleaning morning every week.
Notice I used the word “morning” instead of “day.” Part of the great thing about cleaning is enjoying the fruits of your scrubbing after the fact. My most productive times are the afternoons after I’ve cleaned. Everything is in place. You feel energized by the clearing of the clutter that also clears the mind.

Establish an efficient order.
I clean my kitchen first. It gives me great satisfaction to see a clean kitchen for one, and the dishwasher can run while I clean the rest of the house. The key is establishing something you like to do first. This gives you motivation to keep going.

Appreciate cleaning as quiet time.
I enjoy cleaning because it’s one of the few times where I’m both outwardly focused on an activity and inwardly not using much mental energy. My mind can wander into different directions, new ideas can bubble up, and I can be focused on the task at hand that largely isn’t stressful.

I know that the cleaning work will be done in an hour or two and then I can take pride in creating a safe, comfortable environment to live in.

• Do you enjoy the rituals of cleaning?
• How do you get and stay motivated?

This article was written by the folks at Alice.com, bringing you convenience shopping and free shipping. Check out Alice.com for all your cleaning supplies.