As a mother of a son with Schizophrenia, I have had to learn a whole new language. I have had to learn how to talk to someone who does not have the same reasoning ability that I do. I have had to learn how to be respectful, loving, caring. and patient. I am glad to do this because I love my son.

How To Provide Better Help for Your Ill Loved One

I cannot emphasize how much the NAMI Family-to-Family Education Classes have helped me to be able to do this. I have a few important points I would like to share to help each of you be a better help to your ill loved one:

• Learn as much as you can about your loved ones illness.
• Learn how to draw boundaries so that your loved one knows where you stand.
• Do not be afraid to disagree or to take a stand.
• Learn how to talk to your loved one so that you understand each other.
• Continue to learn everything you can.
• Take care of yourself so that you will be able to deal with the long term nature of your situation.
• Remember that this is most likely a life-long journey you and your loved one are on so solicit help from other family members and friends to help you.
• Find ways to have fun with your loved one so that not all of your experiences are sad or difficult.
• Adjust your expectations to accurately reflect your loved one’s true abilities. Finding a balance between what you want them to accomplish and what they can realistically achieve is difficult but possible.
• Find someone who you can talk to who is experiencing a similar situation and with whom you can share ideas.
• Love your ill family member unconditionally so that they know they have someone they can always depend on.

How has mental illness effected your family? How are you getting the help you need?

• 9 Tips to Parenting a Child Who Has Mental Illness
• 5 Ways to Help Support a Mentally Ill Sibling
• Coping With a Spouse Who Has Mental Illness
• Overcoming the Stigma of Mental Illness

In the weeks before Camp Mighty, we were divided into teams and raised funds for wells to bring clean, safe drinking water to people in developing nations. The hope was to start getting to know each other, while we used our collective talents to do something cool before we even met.

Once we were at the camp, we spent an afternoon renewing and creating a life list. The goal was to come to the camp with a list that included 100 things that you wanted to accomplish. At the retreat, we broke that down to our top five goals and then went around the room and verbally shared those items with our group.

This was a very vulnerable activity for me. Over the last few years, I have held back from creating, wanting, and expressing my dreams. We have had a devastating business loss, children that were struggling, and health issues in our family. I am realizing that I had shut down a side of me that takes chances and dreams. I have been reactive instead of proactive.

I pushed through the activity and realized that as we shared our dreams verbally with the group, the people in the group were very supportive and willing to help make those dreams a reality. One woman shared that she wanted to go to New York and start a business. A woman in the group that said she lived in New York and she could come and stay with her for a short time. Another woman was struggling to get her business off the ground and make a profit. Immediately another person said he had several successful businesses going and that he would be willing to help her develop a business plan that could help her business. I was amazed at the love and generosity that complete strangers had for one another. This proved to be a very productive exercise.

What I learned from this experience was that in order for your dreams to come true, you have to express them. You also need to develop a plan or strategy to accomplish them.

With a New Year right around the corner, what goals or things do you want to accomplish this next year?

5 Ways to Make Your Life List Come True

1. Take some time alone to write them down, dream, and express them. I spent time in a yurt meditating and visualizing the things I wanted to accomplish in my life. I did this at Camp Mighty.
2. Break down your list and focus on your top 5 goals.
3. Find a mentor that will help you accomplish each of your goals. We all need a little help from time to time,      or someone to check up on us. Find a mentor for each item on your list and reach out to them and ask them to hold you accountable.
4. Make a commitment today! Once of the biggest reasons why people fail is they don’t make a commitment to see it through. They want everything to be perfect before they start their goal.
5. Make an action list. Brainstorm every possible thing you need to do in order to accomplish your goal. If you want to work out more, your brain storming list might look like this:

Create a life list or a bucket list today. Allow yourself to dream about the things that you want to accomplish or do in your life. Take the first steps towards making these New Years Resolutions really come true.

What do you have on your life/bucket list? What steps are you taking to make them happen?

Photo courtesy of Camp Mighty.

Join #GNO here this Tuesday where Jeanne from the fabulous Design-her Gals, along with many other amazing women, will be sharing their tips and tricks for taking “me” time along with what gets in the way. We’d love to hear what has worked for you as well. So, come share and be part of the #gno crowd! Hopefully, we’ll all walk away from this virtual party a little more inspired and encouraged to take care of our most important asset—Ourselves!

• What: Girl’s Night Out (What’s GNO? Click here to find out!)
• When: Tuesday, July 7, 9-11 p.m. EDT
• Where: Click here to check out where we party! (Use hashtags #gno and #designhergals.)
  
• Topic: “Me” time: Ways to take time for your most important asset—you!
  
• Who: @designhergal, @emihill, @girlfriendology, @missusp, @momfluential @rolemommy
• Party Favors: Remember to check out this week’s giveaway sponsored by Design-her Gals.
• RSVP: Enter your twitter URL/ID in the list below (e.g., http://twitter.com/jylmomIF).