5 Steps to Overcome Your Fears

I believe in fate and I know the universe provides us with the experiences we need to grow.  I have a massive fear of helicopters, the sound the look and the memories that come flooding in when I see or hear one is enough to bring me to my knees.  I am a brave, try anything once kind of girl so it is very unusual for me to have fear of any type.  My fear and the reason for it can by summed up in one brutal sentence.  The last time I saw my husband alive he was being taken away in a Life Flight Helicopter.  Since that time the sound or appearance of any helicopter can cause huge anxiety and distress for me.

While participating in the Family Forward Weekend Retreat, they announced that Upper Limit Aviation was offering Helicopter rides to some of the bloggers, they did a drawing and I held my breath when they called the names of the winners.  I can’t say I was disappointed when they did not call my name!  We completed or first adventure and the “winners” were directed to the location.  I chose avoidance and went  to the area where lunch would be served and tried to avoid looking or listening to the helicopters land and take off.

I watched from a distance as the helicopters circled and then landed, I was cringing inside the entire time.  All of a sudden someone ran over and told us the helicopter pilots had offered to take more people up and would I like to go?  As l have always promised myself I would do, I quickly said “yes” and headed toward the landing area.  I was trying to act like I had it all together but inside I was terrified!

We  walked over to the landing strip and I felt something inside that is very unfamiliar to this daredevil girl-TERROR!  I decided I better tell somebody the truth of what was going on in case I flipped out and they needed to cart me away.  I told one of the organizers the quick version of what was going on and she leaned over to me and asked “are you going to freak out?”  I answered “I don’t think so… I hope not… maybe!”  She quickly switched everyone around so that I could go first so I would not have to wait for the helicopter to land AND take off before getting onto mine.

I watched the helicopter land, the same size, the same sound, the roar of the engines and the noise from the blades.  My heart was beating out of my chest and I followed the two other ladies that would be riding with me.  As I walked in pure panic, I took photos and videos of the helicopter so I could divert my mind.  The two other ladies jumped into the back seat and shut the door.  Wait, what??!! Then they opened the front door and motioned for me to get in, GULP!!  I was sitting in the front seat with the pilot.

 As we took off I tried to focus on taking pictures and breathing-yep, berating is important!  Memories flooded my mind and tears came to my eyes but I was in the helicopter and nothing bad was happening, this time.  One of the girls spoke up from the backseat and I heard her over the headset say “this is great” the pilot’s response “it’s the only way to go”.  Hmm, the only way to go, is that what Dave thought?  Did he even know he was riding in the sky?  I noticed the roar of the engines had become a comfortable sound and the blades a soft whirring noise.  There were blue skies and clouds all around me and I thought that it probably wouldn’t be a bad way to go.  By the time we landed, my mind had flown all the way back to a terrible day 5 years ago and re-lived many of my memories since that time.  I had found some peace with this big machine that had taken my love and turned my life upside down.  We landed and I walked away a little bit stronger and a lot more peaceful.

I have always been fearless and there is very little that scares me at all, as I thought about how I handle fear and new experiences I realized the biggest factor in my lack of fear is my total belief in fate.  When it is your time to go, it is your time and when it is not your time to go, it is not your time.  With that belief I have decided that I would rather die doing something fun than sitting at home.  I didn’t list that in my 5 tips for overcoming fear because I respect that everyone has different beliefs and some people don’t believe in fate.

1. Say yes! -Even when (especially when) something scares you.  Even though it is your first instinct to say “no” change that around and say “YES” and then let the adventures take you into new and exciting directions.
2. Don’t overthink - Don’t think about everything that could go wrong or how afraid you are.  Instead of thinking “what is the worst thing that can happen” ask yourself “what is the best thing that could happen”
3. Fake it until you make it - It is perfectly OK to tell people that you are afraid but then pull yourself together and charge forward
4. Give yourself to the experience - Live in the moment instead of thinking about how high up you are, think about how beautiful the sky is, how soft the wind is on your face, the sounds, the smells and the feelings.
5. Be proud of your accomplishment - After you conquer a fear, think about how you got through the experience, everything you learned about yourself and how you can use the experience the next time you are afraid.

Life is an adventure and there is A Lotta Living left to do!

Post by: Celeste Ledesma-Gregory