Parenting Question: What Would You Do If Your Child Went Missing for 3 Hours?
Awhile ago, I wrote a post after my boys had gone missing in the neighborhood for about 45 minutes. At the end of that post, I asked a similar question to this post’s title: What would you do if your child(ren) went missing?
What’s prompting me to ask that question again today is a little jaunt down memory lane.
When I was 8-years old, I wanted to go shopping. The mall was 15-20 minutes from my house. My mom was gone. I was left home to babysit my 4-year-old sister. Leaving an 8-year old home alone could be fodder for an entirely different post, but I’ll stick to the point. I had to be resourceful. When a girl “needs” to go shopping, a girl’s got to do what a girl’s got to do, right? For me, that meant calling our local taxi company and hiring a cab to take me, my 7-year-old girlfriend, and my 4-year old sister to said mall. I.WAS.EIGHT!
A little background. My grandma was an alcoholic. She had lost her driver license and so whenever we visited and she wanted to take us anywhere, we’d always have to go in a taxi. It was the only reason I would have been exposed to them as they weren’t abundant in the city of Mesa, Arizona in the 70s. I thought it was totally normal for a person who couldn’t drive to use one to get somewhere they desperately needed to go—like the mall!
Back to the story!
Part of my being resourceful also included borrowing some of my dad’s money and figuring out how to not have the neighbors get in the way of me reaching my final destination. The solution? To have the taxi pick us up in an adjacent neighborhood about three blocks away in front of a stranger’s house.
Mission accomplished!
We spent 2 1/2 glorious hours at the mall. I only had about $3 to spend, so I bought my sister some earrings. Tell me if I wasn’t the most thoughtful sister evs. I didn’t make sure she left the house with shoes on and she ended up shoeless on our journey to the mall, but I bought her earrings. Doesn’t shopping trump everything?
Back to the homestead. My parents had returned home shortly after we had left. My mom called my friend’s house, looking for us. She went around the neighborhood. She started getting worried. And then she found it. My clue! See… I wasn’t totally cold hearted. I didn’t want my mom to worry…too much! So, I wrote a note: “Mom, I’m going to Reed Park… in a taxi.” Sure, it was a half truth, but that last part was all the clue it took for her to call our local Dial-A-Ride and find out about our adventure.
The taxi driver dropped us off exactly where he picked us up, which required us to walk 3 blocks back to our house. We had lots of stares and heard lots of whispers as we made the trek. I didn’t really have a chance to make a grand entrance or say goodbye to my friend when we reached my lawn, because I was whisked away by my nervous mom who marched me right down to my bedroom.
I wasn’t allowed to play with my friend EVER again. Apparently, her mom thought I was a bad influence. WHAT? I was resourceful!!! I saw a need and I met it with limited resources and only a pinch of stealing and lying.
The up side: My sister’s feet returned to their original color. Her ears glistened with the new earrings. I had a huge adventure notch on my belt. And I had given my parents a wild ride! Everyone’s looking for a little something to spice up their life, right? That was me: life spicer upper!
But no matter how many positive spins I put on this story, the fact of the matter is that while I knew I was a shopping diva, in my parents’ eyes, they had two daughters who were MISSING, which was more than quite a scare!
What would you do if your child went missing for 3 hours?
I would be hyperventilating way too badly to find any note or clue and would be freaking. out.
Sounds like a story your family will never allow you to forget! haha
I raised a spicer upper, myself.
When Jonathan (my son) was less than 2 years old, he left the house sometime around 5:30 am, in his diaper and nothing else, and trekked the 1/2 mile down the road to the corner store where we would sometimes walk together. The automatic doors granted him entrance and he marched up to the counter and said, “Coke, please” to the sweet old man on the other side. The old man got a Coke from the cooler and planted Jonathan on a stool next to him. And then called the police.
I didn’t even know he was gone until I was brought awake by the pounding on my door. When I opened the door and saw Jonathan resting comfortably in the arms of the very imposing officer, I almost had a breakdown. But that little stinker not only made his way safely to the store, he also told the police how to get back home.
He’s pulled many such stunts over the years, and each one is just as frightening as the one before. Now he’s 19 and I (thankfully!) am no longer required to keep tabs on him. When it was critical that I do so, though, I slept very little; constantly kept my close neighbors on alert for the little runaway; and constantly drilled into him why it was such a bad idea to take off without Mama.
My answer to your question of “What would you do..” is: Panic, mostly!
Mamma Mia Jyl, I would’ve killed you!!! I cannot imagine finding a note from my 8 y/o son with those words. So I can’t tell you what I would do. LOL
I would completely freak out- call the authorities– and rely heavily on my husbands level headed ways — because I would be way too panic stricken to think straight.
The best part of the story is your sister being shoeless and you buying her earrings–priceless! you definitely were the best sister ever. ha
…. but — the bigger question is— Didn’t the cab driver think it was strange to pick up and drop off 3 small kids at the mall?—
I love reading all of these comments! One thing I failed to emphasize enough, although it doesn’t make it totally better, is that it was 1978 in Mesa, Arizona. While kids definitely went missing in those days, it was a little Pleasantville-ish. But, I need to get my mom to comment here. We laugh so much over this that I’ve never really inquired about how terrified she was.
In today’s time in my hometown (population over 20k): panic, hysteria, calling the police, neighbors and whoever else I could think of.
Where I live now (population less than 1500): yell at the top of my lungs for you to come home. If that didn’t work hit the park two blocks away, the library – three blocks away, the gas station that serve soft serve ice cream – three blocks away and knocking on the neighbors doors as I go. I live in a VERY small town so you wouldn’t be hard to find and unless you were inside a friend’s home, you’d be found LONG before 3 hours.
In the 70′s times were very different so I would be panicked and worried as any parent would but I’m not sure I would call the police…especially in a small Pleastanvill-ish town. It would depend on my neighborhood, my kid’s personality, and the overall circumstances.
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I would FREAK! My (at the time 3) year old was missing for just a few minutes and I had a panic attack. Apparently he wanted to go outside, and so that is what he did. My neighbor found him halfway to her house when she went out to check the mail. I think I was upstairs changing my baby’s diaper. Since then we’ve put top locks like hotels have on the front and garage door (up high so they can’t reach).
Ok, so I actually have 2 occasions – I know you think I was a handful but I was pretty level headed kid.
1st time My mom asked me to quit yakking so I went and fell asleep under a shelf and she searched for hours for me.
2nd time She asked for some “space” as I was chatting while she worked (ok, ok, I was a chatterbox and parrot was my nickname) so I decided to just give her that. I went to a neighbor’s home and was playing with her kid under the table. And then began the mom search. She did stop by the home I was at but another lady that lived there answered the door and since she did not know I was there told my mom so. My mom formed a search party and people were screaming out my name. My friend’s mom heard the commotion in the neighborhood and asked what it was about and when mom mom told her – she said “But she is playing under the kitchen table with my son” Mom freaked, I did not.. she did ask for space, right?