Relationship Tips: 6 Ways to Reconnect With Your Husband
When you first fell in love, it seemed like you and your mate would forever be bound by a magical connection, an intuitive understanding of each other that would last through time. But after a few years of marriage, the magic and understanding that seemed to provide the underpinnings of your happy relationship have all but evaporated, and you’re finding it more difficult than ever to feel connected with your husband. Maybe it’s the pile of dirty socks, the toilet seat left up once too often, or some other little idiosyncratic behaviors that have you at your wit’s end.
While it’s not uncommon to lose at least some of that initial blush, nurturing an intimate connection with your husband is an important factor in ensuring the marriage stays intact. A husband’s satisfaction with intimacy levels early in a marriage plays a strong role in determining whether the couple will remain together, according to a study by researchers at Southern Illinois University School of Medicine.
Intimacy is about more than a sexual connection: It also involves emotional and physical bonds that form the basis of a deeper understanding that can help couples weather the storms of life. If you feel the connection in your marriage is less than robust, these tips can help you rekindle a little of that intimacy.
6 Ways to Reconnect With Your Husband
Do What He's Doing
Show an interest in what interests him. Life can get so busy, it’s easy to get wrapped up in what’s important only to you. But chances are, in the beginning of your relationship his interests were also of some interest to you. Take some time to get involved in his hobbies; who knows? You might find a new interest of your own.
Start Something New
Explore new interests together. Bring some life into your marriage by identifying a common area of interest that you’d both like to learn a little more about. Take a photography class together, join a hiking club, or undertake a home improvement project that requires new skills you can learn together.
Do a Date Night
While it came naturally when you were courting, dating is an art that is soon lost unless you keep practicing. Schedule weekly “couple time” to have dinner or see a movie so you have a chance reconnect and remember what it was that attracted you to each other in the first place.
The Sky is the Limit
Share dreams, yours and his. How can you plan a life together if you don’t know what each other's hopes, dreams, and goals are? Set aside some time on a regular basis to discuss the things that are important to both of you—as individuals and as a couple. Develop goals and timelines to achieve those goals.
Don't Sweat the Small Stuff
Count to 10—or 100. When confronted with some little behavior that annoys you, instead of immediately lashing out, force yourself to take some time to put things in perspective. Is this one annoying thing worth a huge, protracted argument, or can it be ignored —or at least delayed—until cooler minds prevail?
Make Time for Making Love
Invest in some help. Peruse some of the many self-help relationship books and choose one that seems to fit your needs. One worth noting: Sexperiment: 7 Days to Lasting Intimacy with Your Spouse, by Pastor Ed Young. This book deals with the underlying issues in couple relationships and offers real solutions to creating stronger emotional, physical and psychological bonds. The book was authored by Young and his wife Lisa, each offering valuable perspectives.
Connie O'Hare operates a small tech company from her East Coast home, and takes every opportunity she can to take her kids on memorable vacations around the world.
What are some of your secrets for connecting with your husband? How do you make this a priority?