Parenting: How To Practice Self Control and Understanding With Children

me • relationships • parenting • ages and stages

by Alicia Ivey on November 27th, 2011 | No Comments »

Just recently, my family was flying home from Dallas, Texas. This was my seven year-old daughter’s first time on a plane. Surprisingly, she did very well and was quite unimpressed with the whole experience, which amused my husband and myself very much.

Sometimes I feel like the relationship with my daughter is unusual when I compare us to other families. We actually enjoy our daughter’s company and we talk and listen to her as if what’s on her mind is just as important as our own ideas. This was never more noticeable than this particular flight.

As soon as we were seated, my daughter spotted a little girl about her age sitting right behind her. Everyone was busy getting seated and adults were conversing with one another. My daughter began to talk to the little girl. As soon as the little girl went to answer, her mother spoke horribly to her daughter telling her to “shut up." The next thing I heard was this mom yelling at her daughter saying, “Stop humming!” which I had not even noticed. She continued bantering this poor child and it was all I could do not to turn around and tell this woman, “You’re bothering me more than your child. She’s delightful.”

As my daughter continued to try to talk to the little girl, this mother finally yelled at my daughter to turn around. It took everything in my body to stay in my seat. My little girl with tears in her eyes asked me, “Why is that lady so mean?” Knowing the woman could hear me, I desperately wanted to say, “Because she’s mean and cares about no one but herself”; but instead I told my daughter that the woman is obviously under a lot of stress and we should pray for her and especially her daughter. I also added that my little girl could talk to me all she wanted.

I have no idea where this self control came from except from God. He gently reminded me that all of us have bad days as moms. We all have days that we probably wish we could have said something different. I did learn a lot on that flight home; something we should all teach our children: self control and understanding. Our children are watching us and how we handle difficult situations. Some of you may have done something totally different, but in my heart, I don’t think adding to the flames of this woman’s lack of patience would have solved anything.

So, as we’re entering the holiday season and swirling through the sea of shoppers rushing through their day, remember they could be dealing with a dying spouse, a sick child, a nasty divorce, or the loss of a job. Return anger for love and keep the Christmas Spirit alive.

How do you practice self control, patience, and understanding with your children?

Photo courtesy of Flickr.

Alicia Ivey feels very blessed to be a part of a very loving caring family. Alicia is proud to be a mommy and a wife. She has enjoyed traveling, speaking at special events and singing for over 25 years. Alicia enjoys sharing her stories of travel, parenting and the relationships she gains with mybabyclothes.com. Start your holiday shopping and find the perfect baby clothes, baby hats and baby headbands for any little one on your list this year.